The unsolicited piece of Advice!

I do know and can empathise the feeling of the person at the other side of the table who is forced to listen to the unsolicited piece of advice. It adds more discomfort to them for two reasons. One that they get more irritated when someone else is trying to experiment their ideas with our problems and the second that the rain of advice has started without even understanding the problem fully or when there was no such problem existing.

But, viewing the situation in an unbiased manner, I would say the person offering such advice cares a lot for the other person and (barely?)aware that the other person cares a damn for whatever is being said to him in his present state of mind. This mostly happens in a relationship between a girl and a guy. The girl cares for her friend a lot and is genuinely worried about him and his well being and the guy is also treats her as his best friend, but feels he is no longer a kid and is very well capable of handling his problems and any situations on his own. He just want some time and space to sort out things on his own and tries to get away from the girl if he feels he is too much dependant on her (or has she got a feeling that he cant handle things without her being there to help him out). This leads to a lot of worries and tension between the two persons. The person offering her esteemed opinion feels that the other person is not ready to listen to her and might suffer in the end, and the person who is listening is already over burdened with his own thoughts and worries and thus gets frustrated when some more piece of nonsense is being fed to his brain to process.

All that I would say is if you ever care for a person, do communicate it to them. Whatever strikes our mind is to be communicated. I do appreciate the saying "Think twice before saying a word, cause once said they cant be taken back", but humbly feel that think twice to use appropriate word and the style of communicating. But never ever hold back your thoughts, no use regretting later that you should have said that. Be it in expressing you love or giving a piece of advice. Do it when you feel like telling the other person. After all, you might not find another opportunity to express yourself or it would be too late for you to open out ur heart and thoughts.

It is easy to give advices, but what matters is the solution to any problem. The problem here is you want to express your opinion on something that you care for the other person a lot, but the other persons state of mind is not in a condition to patiently listen to your words or opinion. What do you do? Just mail them with the subject clearly mentioning "The unsolicited piece of Advice!" and then go ahead in telling whatever you feel like sharing. Keep it short and sweet. You are doubly benefited. One that your heart becomes light because you have told to the person concerned whatever you felt like telling and the second thing is God forbidden, if what you feared must not have happened and what could have been avoided if your words have been listened to, you wont regret for not having told them. It is now their fault and fate that they have to pay for their own decisions. All you need to do is just to express your thoughts and not argue with them or their actions or not try to drive you point down into their mind and soul then then to the sea!

For those poor listeners, yes it is very hard to listen patiently to someone and all i would say is there is nothing wrong in hearing when someone talks. Especially when it is your dear friend. They might just want to pour down their thoughts and your dedicating your valuable time means a lot to them. Even if you don't listen to them, please pretend to. Alas, amidst your problems and tensions you made someone happy and that someone who really cares for you. Who knows, they might really give you some wise ideas.

Finally, what is all this nonsense in the above paragraphs? Haha! well those are the crap that came to my mind and I wanted to communicate it to someone, but found no ilichavayan/vayee to put mokkai. Afterall its my blog and so there it went. And wont is sound so stupid if i send a mail addressing to myself with the subject "TUsPoA" :P